This time last year, we moved into our house. So much has changed since then, I can hardly believe it. The day we moved in, I cried… and they weren’t happy tears. I was in such a bad place from my miscarriage, that the thought of moving into the house that we ultimately had bought because I was pregnant was almost too much for me to handle.
On move-in day, I remember sobbing to my husband, telling him that I couldn’t do it. I have no idea how I did, but I’m pretty sure it was because of him and his unwavering support. A few weeks later I miscarried again and I was convince the house was cursed. I wanted out so badly and had grand plans to sell it and run away to California.
I was working constantly during the days at my day job and at nights and weekends on the blog, and coming home after work to a cold, empty, and dark house. For those of you not from New England, it gets dark around 4:30 or 5 in the winter and yes, it’s as awful as it sounds! I remember feeling so scared to be alone in the house in the dark without any furniture.
At that time I also didn’t have many friends because I didn’t have the time to cultivate friendships the way I do now.
Fast forward to today, one year later, and I’m so so happy in what once was a house and now is our home. We added Boots to the family (PS see his pictures of his growth here) and he immediately brought endless joy and unconditional love to our lives, plus he keeps me company if Anel is working late and it’s dark out. I’m not gonna lie though, that first few months with a puppy was rough. So glad he’s finally over the puppy stage.
I’m also in a much better mental state after months and months of hard work with acupuncture, meditation, and many long conversations with Anel. Only when I started feeling better on the inside, was I able to fully appreciate our home.
So far, some of my favorite memories in the house include Anel’s nightly “dance” with the dog (I’ll have to Snapchat it sometime, it’s so cute!), our weeknight candlelight dinners (every night, unless we’re out), hosting our some fun dinner parties, overnights with my sister, BBQs in the backyard with friends over the summer, and having our first trick-or-treaters earlier this week.
My not-so-favorite memories were decorating for Christmas last year (It was supposed to be so happy but I was so sad), dozens of negative pregnancy tests, and the time Boots got really sick with Pneumonia. I’m happy to say that we’re making more good memories than bad and those are quickly starting to fade into the distant past.
I’m hoping that the next year brings a baby and of course a fabulous nursery, but if it doesn’t, I know that we’ll be ok!
What we’re still working on
The dining room
The entryway staircase
And here are a few of my favorite photos taken around the house. Enjoy!
Living room before
Living room after