I am so happy to finally be sharing this life-changing news with you all! Anel and I are expecting our second baby in April 2021. Out of all the craziness of this year, getting pregnant has given us something to stay positive for and to look forward to. We are over the moon excited to be growing and completing our family!

I’m 4 months (16 weeks) pregnant which means that I’ve been hiding this little secret for 3 months now. That has been quite the challenge. I’ll share all of the gritty details of my first trimester in tomorrow’s blog post (spoiler alert: it wasn’t cute), but today I’ll talk about our journey to this pregnancy, how we found out, and Amalia’s reaction.

Let’s start in the summer…

It was Saturday, August 15th, and the first day of Amalia’s potty training. Our plan was to take off her diapers that morning and just go for it. My period was also due that day. We had been trying to get pregnant for a year so I had called a fertility clinic the day before to make an appointment. The day before! But I decided to take a test just to rule out the pregnancy that month. I knew if I didn’t, I’d be thinking about it all day.

I thought that there was no way it was possible because I had spotted a few days before which always happens when I get my period and never happens when I get pregnant (remember this is my 4th pregnancy counting the two miscarriages).

As I was putting the top back on the test, I watched two very very bright pink lines pop up immediately. It didn’t take the 5 minutes that it usually does. The result was so fast that I figured it was a flaw in the test. So I pulled out the digital test that I’d been saving as a backup (those things aren’t cheap!). Sure enough, that one said Pregnant in big bold letters.

My hands started shaking and I could hear my heart beating in my ears but I still didn’t fully believe it so I sprinted down the stairs to show Anel. Both of us were in total shock because, as I said, we had thought that month was a wash. That whole day, we would look at each other and ask if it was really happening over and over.  Luckily we were able to distract ourselves with potty training for much of the day. It took about a week for the reality to really settle in.

And settle in it did. My morning sickness started earlier than last time, at 5.5 weeks, and it was fast and furious. That mixed with the quick double lines on my test had us thinking it could be twins. Because of my history of miscarriage and the fact that I’m 35, my doctor gave me a sonogram at just over 6 weeks to confirm the healthy pregnancy… and the fact that there is only one baby in there.

10 weeks later and I’m happy to report that the (one!) baby is still healthy and growing despite a few scares (more on that tomorrow). And the sickness from my first trimester has mostly passed. I’m now feeling healthy, strong, excited… and always a little tired. But a happy tired.

So how did we get here? Let’s jump back again to September 2019 (remember good ole’ days?).

We had just moved into our new house, Amalia was newly two years old, and we finally felt ready to try for our second baby. Something about settling into our forever space made us want to grow our family.

We tried from September-March with no success. When COVID hit, we decided to take April off because I was so scared at the time about the virus and what was going on in the world. Once we realized that it was here to stay for the foreseeable future, we decided we didn’t want to put our lives on hold indefinitely.

As time went on I got more and more anxious about the age difference between Amalia and our next child but tried to stay calm about that as much as possible. In March, my sister got pregnant with my niece (she’s due in December) so that helped take my mind off of my own struggles. I was just so happy for her! And now I’m even happier because our babies will be 4 months apart in age. Being pregnant at the same time as she is has been SO much fun.

Throughout the whole process, I tried many of the things that I did to get pregnant with Amalia: I took prenatal vitamins, beef liver supplements, cod liver oil, drank tons of bone broth, tried to drink less alcohol (which proved difficult during COVID) and got acupuncture whenever I could. In July, I finally decided to try giving up gluten because it worked the first time around. And that was when we conceived. Anecdotally, giving up gluten 100% has helped me get pregnant twice now. Go figure.

As a funny side story, in March I had a call with the psychic who I speak to once a year. He told me that I would get pregnant in August but at the time that felt so far off, I thought he must be wrong (for the first time ever). But per usual, he was right!

The hardest part of keeping our secret was not telling Amalia. I was so so sick for many weeks and couldn’t be my usual self with her.  But I didn’t want to tell her in case of another loss. I didn’t want her to have to go through that too. We waited until I hit 12 weeks then Anel and I told her together. We were expecting a huge reaction but she wasn’t too excited at first which made us nervous.

A few hours later, she started asking a ton of logistical questions like where will the baby sleep? Can I sit next to the baby in the car? Where will the baby take a bath? Can I help change diapers?

She has since warmed up to the idea and likes to hug and kiss “her baby” by snuggling with my tummy every night before bed which is very sweet. Every few days she asks if her baby is coming out yet. I think it’s going to be a long 6 months for all of us!

She also decided that we will name it Rainbow… so there’s that.

We are all beyond excited for this next chapter in our lives! Anel and I look forward to sharing more about this pregnancy and our plans for the future in the coming weeks and months. Thank you so much for taking this journey with us.

Photo by Julia Dags.